I’ve never done a lot of dating (that is to say, I’ve never really asked anyone out, and no one’s really asked me). It used to bother me – a lot. “Why does everyone else have a boyfriend and not me?” I’d whine to my mother, friends, or really anyone who would listen. It’s teenage angst, I guess, and that certainty that not having a significant other makes you the ultimate freak of nature, because of course you are the only person in history that has ever been single for any length of time. Ever.

 

But because it is my boyfriend’s birthday (Sept. 11, and yes, I do have a boyfriend now) I thought I’d reflect not just on our relationship but on love in general, especially young love. I’m sure everyone remembers their first love – that feeling that it will last forever, the butterflies every time they say your name, the uncertainty (and then the “wow!”) of the very first kiss. It’s beautiful. It’s wonderful and amazing and fragile.

 

The odds, I’m told, are that it won’t work forever, and maybe that’s right. But I think the very best part of love is hope, and the understanding that though things may change, love doesn’t. Love persists, through the best of times and through the worst. I can testify to that: My boyfriend, Adam, once spent hours with me on a day where I had a fever of 102, a horrible headache, chills, sweating, nausea, and hadn’t been able to take a shower since the previous day. I looked horrible – day-old mascara, bedhead, and pajamas, and we’d had plans with other friends that day. Not only did he cancel those plans with other people in order to stay with me, he brought me 7-Up and saltine crackers. That, I think, is love (and serious devotion!).

 

Love is such a common thing, and yet so few of us take the time to stop and think about how precious and beautiful it really is. When is the last time you told your husband why you love him, or called your boyfriend just to ask about his day? It’s not naïve to believe that love can last forever, even young love. It’s not silly or innocent – it is the nature of the emotion. Love can do anything, be anyone, change everything. It doesn’t have a script or a formula, and time and again it defies everything we believe it to be.

 

Yes, I know that age and experience bring with it a sensibility about love. I know that maybe things won’t stay the same and maybe someday we’ll have to start anew. But for now – and forever, as far as I’m concerned – what I have (and what all of us have) is perfect. It is life-changing and monumental and even though we are just two out of 6 billion people, the love we have is enough to change the world. It’s corny and outdated and cheesy, but there it is.

 

I love you, Adam, and happy birthday!

 

I will never get tired of saying it.